I do not intend this post to be a eulogy. Think of it more as a letter from a friend. More like a pen-pal, really, given how often I show up.

Last night I became curious. It took some time, but I managed to dig up my old Roblox account. They almost lost my password and for the tiniest moment I thought the RP section was deleted. But the archives were untouched, and a relic was unearthed.

I present to you, the first RP thread I ever joined: Stay Alive.

forum.roblox.com/Forum/ShowPost.aspx?PostID=42245794

This was five years ago. I was in middle school. AVD had started a few months ago, gaining traction quickly, and Naru was still sharing an account with her little brother.

The exact reason I found myself in the RP section is long forgotten. But on that day Stay Alive was on top of the front page. Role-playing had never really appealed to me before. For some reason, on some whim, I jumped in on page four.

You can literally read my nervousness in my writing. In my actions. Hiding, running, flailing about, needing to be coaxed into conversation. And I was nervous because I was just...excited. From the start I was Totally and utterly electrified. I didn't even wait to be accepted, I just got going. Refreshing the page ten times a minute, waiting to see is Killer3045 had responded yet and what she'd said and how the story was going to go and what was going to happen. This was new territory.

In Stay Alive I had my first run-in with Equi, Naru, and Creation. You treated me kindly and when I asked to join other threads you didn't say no. It got to the point where seeing you was a sign of quality. Where I wanted to RP with you. Where, eventually, you wanted to RP with me.

That was acceptance. For six months in the middle of the school year the only thing on my mind was my character, your characters, the threads and plotlines and total nonsense which I typed each and every day. And even if it turned out to be only six months (Or maybe less) it still felt like a long, long time.

The Migration to Ucoz AVD was something new. It seemed like the entire world had shrunk down to only the coolest people in the RP section. The stage had changed, and more characters appeared. I already knew Toxic pretty well, but now Dillon and Spez and eventually Scott became more familiar figures than they were on the old board. These were the best and longest days.

Until I got grounded.

When I finally returned on Christmas day, I logged in to see most of the threads I entered either dead or (Rightfully) plowed over. By this time I had made friends in the real world, started to play video games and began to take my life a little more seriously. So I placed AVD on hold. I'll come back one day, I said.

It remained on the back burner for a long time. Years went by. Once every few months I would log in, join a thread, and in a few weeks be called away on some vacation or project. Any story I joined became marked for death. Why bother, I figured. Instead, I took the role of a watcher. You are some of my oldest companions, and every few months I would drop in to see how you were doing. Message a few people. Talk a little. And then back to silence.

I don't remember Creation leaving. I was told Spez left back in December. But I do remember when Toxic had to go.

Toxic ran Vilorans and Demons. ( forum.roblox.com/Forum/ShowPost.aspx?PostID=43970218 for the second chapter of the madness) He was nothing but kind and I always enjoyed playing with him.

And when I logged back in after another absence, I found a message waiting for me. It was Toxic. He told me he was leaving. He said I was one of the best role-players he had ever played with. He said Goodbye to me personally.

All I could do was say goodbye back. I don't even know if he logged back in to see my message.

In December of 2015, I logged on to find the site dead. Fearing the worst, it came as a palpable relief to find the new site URL. The spirit still lived on, years later.

And now, as I log in today, I see no posts since May, the latest shoutbox says June.

Maybe Equi is right. Maybe the magic is gone. I'm not in middle school anymore, and entered college some time ago. I'm nearly an adult. We all have lives and responsibilities and everything else that goes along with the real world we live in.

But even if it is the end, and I hope not, I want to post this. I want to say Thank you.

I want to say thank you to every person on all three sites who made me love Role-Playing. I want to thank you for the time and energy you spent into tolerating me, into responding to me, into making my day better. I want to thank you for making bad days good, and most importantly, for being my friends when I felt so alone.

In a very real sense, I care for each and every one of you. We only know each other because of this site...and if it goes down, I'll lose contact with you forever. Your lives are mysterious to me, and I hope that you live it to the absolute fullest.

If I ever write a book, I know exactly who's going in the Dedications.

Creation001. ToxicMilkshake. Spez. Scott. Equinox. IloveDogs2. And Narutard.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

-DepressedDuck.